Here it is, guys! Finally! :D

There are so many people who comment my stories, and so many people who add me and I never really keep good enough track of these things, so here we go!

If you add me, leave me a comment here! I don't care or mind if discussions erupt in here, random fangirlings, whatever. And don't worry, this is not a friend locked journal and never will be. I just want to get to know you guys more if you want to talk to me. ♥

well. basically, it's been forever since i posted any sort of decent entry. and i feel like posting one about the last couple of days and life in general and blahblahblah. so, real life + fandom ramblings? awwyeahhh.


( age is just a number, baby. what are you, like, 40 now? )

aish, i haven't properly updated this thing in what feels like years, have i? unfortunately, this is still not a proper update. maybe tomorrow?

for now i just want to say hello/welcome/all that jazz to the people i met over at theeeee....





i'm so excited about new friends, etc. :D so for anyone new or other friends that have been around for a while, add me on twitter if you have it! i'm blingalmighty. and i have msn and aim, so yup. hit me up if you want ;D

aaaand now bedtime because early class and fucking scheduling for tomorrow, ugh. will elaborate on that tomorrow or something. for now, have a jjong face ㅎㅅㅎ

i haven't really posted any sort of proper real life entry in, uh, ever. rofl. not sure if anyone really cares to read my senseless rambling but whatever, there's nothing else for me to do this late cause i don't feel like watching a drama and the meme is slow. so here i go?


( i'm the cool cat ~meow~ )

i know i haven't posted in this thing in forever and now suddenly i'm spamming it out with kpop stuff. i know i'm late on this one, i know it's a little strange, but ... my views on the 2PM scandal have shifted. i'm more upset over it now than i think i've ever been, and i don't know why, but i miss jay. suddenly, i want him back so much. and i can understand where the khottests are coming from. because it hurts to think about. stupid as it is, lame as some people might think, it does.

and it hurts to think about kangin, too. it hurts to think he could lose his spot in super junior, and to think that the fucking netizens never learn their lessons.

and i don't even know where to start with dbsk. there's too much. too many things to think about, even though i try not to. it's hard for me to even listen to them now, cause it gets my thoughts going. gets me thinking way too much about things that i don't want to have to think about until we get the verdict.

i just ... i don't know. kpop is such a mess right now, and i hope it clears itself up. SHINee will be my happiness for now. they'll bring a smile to my face and i'll listen to their music and love them and hope that no misfortune comes to them. cause they're just so adorable. ♥

/ pointless rant

( oh lawd, time for a fandom rant )

IN OTHER NEWS. SHINee's album is the shit. jojo is an amazing song and key's rap in get down definitely brings the lolz. that's all i've got for now. yo, man. rock out. peace~

hokai, so. i haven't posted in about a million years, huh? there are about a thousand things i could probably write about, but i don't really feel like going off onto all of those tangents right now. perhaps soon?

a quick overview of things. college is going really well, and i really love super junior right now. like, so much. ugh, those boys. ♥ and, after hearing ring ding dong, i have decided that i do like SHINEee. actually, i'm kind of starting to love them, despite taemin's absolute creepiness.

slightly serious time? i'm starting to feel that inevitable times-a-changing kind of thing that all the adults always like to tell you about. i don't know. things are changing, i guess. people are changing too, and it can't be helped. it just makes me feel sad. i don't like having that feeling that my friends are slipping away from me, or that they aren't interested in even speaking with me anymore, you know? but ah well.

back to randomosity. korean is going surprisingly well. i'm picking up the language fairly quickly and having fun doing it. i think this really is the thing for me, and now more than ever i'm sure that i want to have this in my life forever. not necessarily the whole obsessive kpop fangirl thing, but definitely the language and working with it and such. like the teaching job i hope to get in the future. 한국어재미있어요~ ^^



that is all.

just did a little mini itunes meme to kick myself into actually writing something. only five songs, all pretty short, pairing yoosu. and they cut off cause i stopped writing when the song ended. really random, i know, but something is always better than nothing, right? ♥


( and they found you on the bathroom floor )

hmm, wow. i haven't updated this in a loooong time. i haven't had the time, really. i don't even really have the time now, but ah well. so let's see, what all has happened?

i chopped off my hair. got into the korean class at IU. bought jeans in almost every color of the rainbow. (sort of) dealt with a loss in my family. became addicted to 2PM. cried a little when i thought dbsk was disbanding. cried more when i saw the picture of you mv (♥). listened to seaside and wondered what the hell sm was thinking. got into SHINee.

these last few weeks have just been kind of ridiculous. but really, the picture of you video is so. beautiful. idek. that song has been my favorite ballad ever since i heard it, it and insa are the two that make me cry every time. and the video was just so calming and gorgeous. i love it, a lot. i also really love 2PM, a lot. wild bunny is so great, idek. it's to the point now where i anxiously await every tueday/wednesday cause i know that's when the subbed versions will come out. sighs.

what else can i say about real life? college is coming and it scares the shit out of me. i hung out with a lot of my high school friends lastnight and we talked about it a little while we watched the stars from my friend's trampoline. he lives way out in the country, so they were beautiful. i saw my first shooting star, and also saw venus and my friends claimed to have found cassieopeia. it's getting closer to time to say goodbye, for people to start moving away and moving on, and it's kind of hard to grasp when i really try to think about it.

i want to write. yoosu. my bbs. ;___; ♥

( free your mind )

i also want to write. so bad. it's been too long, and i miss it. hopefully i'll get some days off work next week to just chill or something. i doubt it, but one can hope, right?

i also wish i could go to the fair again before it goes out of town. but i know i won't. it was fun, though.

alright. emo post is emo and also over. sorry for the rant, but it does make me feel better somehow. hopefully when i get back from orientation i'll be a little less depressed. ♥

so i was having kind of a shit day (people are srsly dumb and need to stop) but then this happened.




i love how much fail happens to me on a daily basis. also, the mystery machine was in the parking lot at my work. and i'm so not even kidding. hopefully tomorrow's training won't be terribly boring, and then i get the weekend off! \o/

i am already starting to sense the downside that will come with working in the same place as my mother.

my boss-to-be(? lol) told my mom that he would probably have me come in for training on wednesday. by the time i got back home yesterday he had left a message on the machine, and i called back but he was gone for the day. my mother woke me up at 7 THIS MORNING to call him back. he wasn't there yet, so when she left for work, she hassled him until he said i could come in today. I DO NOT WANT TO COME IN TODAY, MOTHER. I SLEPT FOR 4 HOURS. I AM IN NO WAY READY FOR JOB TRAINING. OMFG.

so much rage about this. and i'm so tired i feel like i'm going to like collapse or something. )< do not want ever. the only upside is that apparently i don't have to go back until friday after this and my hair looks pretty osm after showering this morning lol. if you can't tell i'm putting off leaving. do not waaaaant slkfjslfkjkjgf -flails-

randomness, but I'M GOING TO IU NEXT YEAR~~ so excited, seriously. cannot even try to contain myself. 8D i didn't think it would actually happen but it is and i have orientation later this month and just omfg~~~ 

i think i'mma go finish getting ready and call my mom to see if i can go out there and get this shit done yet -__- blehhhh.

sooo i came home from hanging out with some friends today to discover that home depot FINALLY called about me starting training. unfortunately their timing sucks cause my axel comes back from europe tonight and if i start training in the morning... just, epic fail. D: wants to see friends desu.

in other news, i really suck at writing lately. i mean, the writing itself isn't bad but i suck at getting motivated enough to actually do it, lol. i need another push of inspiration like yoosutic 8D 

umm this is a pointless entry. i'm considering diving into 2PM fandom. y/n? 

that's about all.

remember how i was in a bad mood? then i talked to yuxi. it was surprisingly serious until i failed so hard that i hurt from laughing.


roxas      says:
i was reading up on it and apparently he did almost the same thing during the clinton pregnancy
            roxas      says:
then he just kinda shut up until now
yuxi - made me smile. says:
LOL
            roxas      says:
and he's just bawwing or sth
yuxi - made me smile. says:
clinton pregnancy?
yuxi - made me smile. says:
i'm confused
yuxi - made me smile. says:
LOL
            roxas      says:
... OH MY GOD
            roxas      says:
I MEANTTO SAY
yuxi - made me smile. says:
LMFAO
yuxi - made me smile. says:
THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT
yuxi - made me smile. says:
PRESIDENCY!?
yuxi - made me smile. says:
LMFAOOOOOOO

i always find myself annoyed with what seem to be small, trivial things. right now, there are a fair bit of them.

i'm annoyed because i have to babysit this kid again next week. i want to get my hair cut like NOW but i can't since the hair salon doesn't open again until monday and i'll be babysitting from the time it opens to the time it closes. tuesday too. my friends continue to do things without inviting me and then don't respond when i ask if they want to hang out, etc. my shoulder popped the other day and now hurts/my arm feels weird, though i'm probably worrying over it more than i should be. i have no plans at all for tomorrow.

if you cannot tell, i am in a bad mood. it may be better for myself and the world if i simply go to bed and, hopefully, wake up happier tomorrow.

title: (in)complete
author: xiahki 
pairing: yoosu
rating: nc-17
genre: smuttt
summary: let’s do it. it starts now, open your eyes. what you haven’t seen till now, drown yourself in my charisma.

a/n: omfg i haven't written smut in MONTHS. SERIOUSLY, MONTHS. the last time i wrote it was in february, so pardon me if i'm a little rusty D: this will probably make its way to my writing journal eventually, but not yet. i need to see if anyone even cares about fic anymore first :'D umm yeah i was inspired by yoosu doing xiahtic. srsly wonderful, boys. ♥ that's about it ... i hope you enjoy!!


( you've never experienced fantasy. )

i feel like i spend way too much of my time feeling depressed and completely alone. i hate it when i get like this. i hate it when i suddenly feel like complete shit and i start crying for no reason and i can't bring myself to stop.

it always seems to happen when there's absolutely nobody available to talk to. it always seems to end up making me feel so much more alone. and the stupidest things set me off.

my mom asked me if i wanted to go out to dinner with them. i showered and such so i would be dressed if i did want to, but then my stomach started hurting and i was just in a bad mood and i told her i didn't want to go.

stepdad: "oh, god forbid you go anywhere. you haven't been out all week, so you shouldn't go." 

sarcastic, of course. but he seemed excited enough that they could go to a restaurant i don't like since i decided not to go. as soon as they left, i started crying. i wish i knew what the hell was wrong with me.

title: happily ever after
author: xiahki
pairing: yoosu
rating: r
warning: mentions of drug use and prostitution.
summary: a little piece of something from the same universe as my bigbang fic, heaven. junsu wants a happily ever after more than anything, but everything comes at a price.

a/n: i haven't written fic in so long. so. so. long. and this is really short and probably crap but my muse wanted to start it and so i just kinda let it go. it's more of a drabble than anything, really angsty and depressing, but at least it's something. ♥


( he would never understand that junsu couldn't be a happily ever after )

mkay, so. as you guys prooobably know from my entries before, my sora came to visit this weekend with her friend sao. and we had sooo much fun. ♥

we were gonna go to a foam party at this nightclub kinda place called fusion ... but then it FAILED. like, everywhere. seriously there were not many people there at ALL and there was practically no foam. so we were like ummmmm awkward and we decided to just walk around instead. but then everything was closed so we went to mcdonald's and then came back to my house to chill and watch ADVENT CHILDREN COMPLETE SKDJSLFJDLKJD THE PRETTIES *___*

yeah we stayed up until 7 in the morning doing that. x__x guh. but then today we watched demyx time and went to the mall in casual cosplay before they had to go home. it was fun. and sora ate like a 2000 calorie chocolate bunny which was AMAZING. and we got it on film. so. yes.

this weekend was fun.

OHYEAH. i got accepted. to IU. yesterday. they sent me an email telling me i was accepted off the waiting list and i would be getting info in the mail and i want to go SO FUCKING BAD. the problem is we already applied for my loans at purdue and my mom is extremely unsure about trying to switch it around. but i want to. so so so so SO bad. so we'll see what happens. i'm sure i'll keep everyone posted. 8D 

um, that's about all i have to say. time for me to go do nothing for like the rest of the night since my parents went to a concert that i KNEW NOTHING ABOUT and left me here alone. -___- fail.